Wednesday 5 January 2000

Playing Games - Chapter 37

 




  Chapter 37

 

                                                                THE TIME

                                    I COULD HAVE REALLY  NEEDED MATT

                                                     TO BE CHEERED UP!



 Now, just let me tell yeah all what happened around this time! Because what happened was, on the very same year that my dad had sadly died, and was coming up to the first Christmas of not having my dad around!  But who the family-like had heard some disturbing news!  News, that as a small child had the most biggest crush-like that you wouldn't believe over him!  Because, who I so loved as a little girl had also died, which I won't say how for good reason!  But yes!  He also, had sadly died on the very same year, though, that my dad had died!  

 Which was once again in the year, 2008!  I thought, to myself then, boy!  If only my darling, Matt was around?  As, I think I needed to be cheered up!  Only, no sooner then I had thought that Deek who was only visiting, told me, “stop, stoking Matt!  Which to be frank, wouldn’t dream of doing, in a million years!  Made me thought, well why did he thought I would do that!  As well as, how on earth did he knew I was trying to only cheer myself up by going nearer to Matts work, so if it was possible to see if Matt was there!

 Only, after thinking about it, Matt must have told Deek that what I was doing when I tried to cheer myself up at the time!  Because of what I did, exactly, after hearing about my child-hood sweet heart sudden death!  Which was going into a small coffee shop, opposite to Matt’s work!  But as I went in, I think I wanted to sort of make sure I was sitting where I can see him!  That's if I could, due to a small exit from this coffee shop!  Though, that didn’t mean to say that I kept glancing over to see if I could just see him!  Or even would have loved two, “nope!  As it was just that I really needed to feel like I was closer to my brown- eyes aka Matt!  Which as you know, was Matt to cheer myself up!

 But that doesn’t mean to say that I never tried to look up, to just see if I could see him, whilst I was in there, writing away!  It was just it weren't me that had kept glancing over, while I was there, like as if I was mad on them!  Why, hell, no!  It weren't!  Course what I could see from his part was that it was him that just couldn't stop looking at me every now and again, whist I was looking at him!  While I was writing away, as usual, after something told me to just look up slightly again!   Only, while I had, this time I saw one of his work colleagues go over to the far corner, which after a short time had saw Matt reappear with the most biggest grin upon his face, trying not to notice me looking!  As, he to had tried to kept looking at his work-colleague, while also trying not to look at me!  

 But who then, decided to stand over with his arm leaning against one side of the desk talking to his colleague, while at the same time, had occasionally had kept glancing over to where I was sitting again, in that coffee shop!  Which, of course was like I tried to example!  So, really it was Matt, that had kept looking straight at me then not the other way round!  As I’m sure he had made it out to be to Deek when he must have meant, by saying to me, “stop stoking Matt!  

 As well as, you must have known the other reason, of why I couldn’t continue in writing, while I was in that small coffee shop that was opposite to Matts work again!  Because of the way Matt had kept glancing over to my direction!  And probably even more so after I saw him leaning against that very same desktop, the way he had before!  Talking to one of his colleagues, because occasionally of him glancing over to me with that knock-out smile!

 And well being a romantic as I am, not only made my imagination run a little wild! but who first thought how it was funny to actually see Matt really showing his presents once again!  Because as he could have carried on with his work!  But no!  He didn’t!  Course, secondly, it was definitely the way he was when I saw him leaning his arm against that desktop while at times, he was trying not to show that he was slightly looking at me for sure!  And with a smile!

 Now, if I’m not mistaken, this event could have happened around the same year, but I’m not a hundred per cent certain on that!  Because of what happened!  As it was drawing more closer to Christmas, well after I only popped into a shop that was like a drug shore to find out about something, well who should I discover that came wondering in, just minutes after I did?  But Matt!  As it was like unexpected!  If you know what I mean!  And yes!  You could say it also, really surprised me!  Because it sure didn’t look like he had the day off  while he wonder in-like!

 Which first, I didn’t thought much of!  As I went my own way to the till, where I could inquire about this one item I wanted to find out more about!  Only, after asking while I waited for them to return, with the item well being yours truly, had moved over just slightly!   So, that the rest of the customers could pay for theirs!  The only thing, while waiting, turned around and noticed brown eyes aka Matt was standing so near to me!  But who wasn’t trying to look at me!  Why?  Well I have no idea!  

 And yet, even though, he wasn't trying two, had looked-like he made out to me he probably wanted two!  Because of each time I tried saying, “hello,” to him, well Matt just wouldn’t look up at me!  For instead, he looked as if he was looking up in another direction!  But who then, gave me the indication that he so wanted two, by the expression that he was giving me!  As I saw him not only trying not to look, but who was smiling!       

Which, I did actually think well why, aren’t you looking at me Matt?  “Hey!  Just tell me that!  Why?  I mean I did say hello, to you!  But as I thought of this, had suddenly remembered that incident of when Bobby had came dashing into work that day, from her break, shouting out loud that news about Matt, from her tiny-little-twisted gob, to Cilla!  Because of whom she had then, nastily turned around, to face me by suddenly, opening that decrepit gob of hers, to say, "well, have you got a problem, with that Sandy?"  Which, all I truly wanted to do right there and then, was give her a right left hook, on her pale, thinness, pointed face!!!  

  But that wasn’t the main reason of why I had quickly left as I did, after trying to say, “hello,” to Matt!   As it was just that it didn’t help the situation that I was in, of noticing Matt in the way he had acted towards me!  And I mean, for not looking at me with those big brown sexy eyes!   While I was so near, yet so far, to him!  Which, as you know, hadn’t realised until, I had turned around and saw him!  As well as, not forget, who was smiling at the same time!  Which of course, had made this girl feel all shy-like inside of herself!  Not forgetting, who also felt quite confused, in the process, because for Matt to make out in a big way, that he was completely ignoring me!  Yet, at the same time, could somehow tell he wanted to get my full attention of him of being there, in front of me!

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