Wednesday 5 January 2000

Playing Games - Chapter 38


Chapter 38


                                                                THE TIME

                                      WHEN MATT HAD CAME INTO WORK

                                              BUT WHO TOTALLY IGNORED


 But speaking of how Matt had made me feel then, like I wasn’t there!  Brings me to yet another time when, as usual, Matt had visited us!  Only, the way it looked, this time was as usual, seeing Wednesday aka Bobby!  Because of how he always seems to go straight towards her!  Who really, I like to describe her more as a small, but who was skinny-like a charcoal-stick person!  After Matt had walk in!  And even though, he may say a quick, “hello,” to everyone, including myself, while passing, that’s not the point!  For the guy had never seem to think of stop to talking to anyone else, properly!  !

 Although, when he had just sometimes came over to me, well I must confess I think I loved it!   And I do mean, that I loved those times when he had!  But saying that, there was this one time, that after he had walked straight into our work to see Bobby well, no sooner then he had, had acknowledge Emmitt!   Who by the way, was a fairly tall guy, that also worked with us, but who was at the till!  But who Matt had then went straight up to the back, where of course, Bobby was!  But who was ignoring me completely, after I had tried to say, “hello,” to him more then once!

 Which, I have to say, must have known full well that, that was really going to upset me while he was carrying on walking towards Bobby!  And then, who Emmitt eventually joined in with them!  But even after Emmitt had joined them, thought to myself let me try again, to say, hello, to Matt!  But still, like an idiot!  Was referring to Matt who had kept on avoiding me, like I didn’t even existed!  And yes!  You could say I did wonder what on earth was he doing?  But then, I thought, well if you want to be funny, then be funny!  Only, I really had wanted him two, at least turn himself around to me and say, “hi, Sandy!  Even for a brief moment, that would have been so nice!  But yet again, Matt just didn’t at all the times, while he was there, had turned around to face me!

 And I certainly do mean, he wouldn't turn around to say “hi,” to me, whenever I had tried to say, “hello," to him!  But which, I reckoned both Emmitt and Bobby must have realised that I was really getting a little upset by this by now!  Because of noticing Bobby more then Emmitt of looking over towards me!  Course, of her expression that she was giving me, while she was looking with a smile!  While Matt on the other hand, was still chatting away to them both!  Even after they may have looked-like they was finished talking, from the back, I just couldn’t help from saying, “hello,” to him!  Just don’t ask me why?  But I did!

 Because, just before leaving, Matt had stopped at the till to speak to Emmitt, while waiting for Bobby!  As Bobby was going on her break then!  Which, was when I slowly moved in to say, “hi,” to Matt!  Or even tried two before Matt went out!  But silly me, should have known better when I actually thought, I’ll give it just one more go, in trying to say "hi," to Matt!  But as I walked up slightly behind him to say, “hi, Matt!  The guy just didn’t take one blind of notice of me!  Which was where I had quietly said to Emmitt, from where I was working and who was looking straight at me!  Quietly tried to say, “don’t worry Emmitt!  And this was while Matt was still there! 

 So, after leaving him!  So, Matt could simply carry on talking to Emmitt, I of  course, was now feeling really sad!  But who could blame me for that!   As I was still feeling quite confused over why on earth was Matt wasn’t coming over to me to talk!  While he was there, I mean, what was the guy thinking he was playing at?  For ignoring me totally-like!  As well as, when both Bobby and himself was walking out!  Which, as they did, did even  try to say my goodbyes to them!  Since they had said their byes to Emmitt like and vice-versa!  But thinking that I would finally get some response back from Matt himself as he was leaving with Bobby, well he still didn’t say nout to me!

 Which, after I did try to say my "goodbye,” to him and more then once, may I had! Because of how I so wanted Matt to acknowledge me while he was there, then rather keeping ignoring me, as he had done!  Noticed while I was trying two, get Matt’s attention, Emmitt could see me getting so emotionally by this!  Because of how my feelings was deeply hurting by how Matt had just ignored me, throughout the time he was there!  

 As I really truly tried to understand of what could I have done to him to deserve that treatment from him!  Him!  That yes!  I loved so much!  I mean, it’s not like I wanted to hurt him!  Or even wanted to do anything to him!   Course, first of all, the guy wasn’t even working with us any longer!  And secondly, I wouldn’t even dream of hurting Matt, even if I wanted two, I couldn't hurt my darling, Matt!  No way!!!  Even, if  I didn't have these feelings for him like, wouldn’t dream of hurting him!

 Because I must admit, ever since I first saw Matt just standing near to the front of our shop as I did, learning against that table and thought to myself, wow! wow! wow!  Now, that’s one person I could never hurt, if he was to work here?  Which, to be honest didn’t know at the time that he was!  Because this was just before I knew he was going to be working with us!  And after I did, well what was going through my mind was, oh!  

 My god!  It looks as if Deek as got my wish granted for me after all!  By hiring someone that after telling him more then once, “why can’t you hire someone that’s tall, dark hair, with nice eyes, plus a nice smile with a wacky sense of humour?"  Not forgetting, wo also, added "who’s got to be board for me!  Because, yours-truly, really had asked Deek to do this way back then, but before he hired Matt and snobby Bitch Liz!

 Anyway, as soon as pencil-stick- Wednesday aka Bobby had walked out with Matt and said first to Emmitt, "bye Emmitt!  Well, after I cried out to both of them, thinking Matt could have at least turned around slightly, giving one of his nice smiles!  Emmitt, straight away, could see that I was trying to get Matt's attention, by saying, “bye Matt!  Because I thought, well surely now, the guy would say, "bye to me!  But did he egos-like!  The Bastard!  Course, he didn’t turn around!  Though, if it wasn’t for Emmitt, who cried out to him, which I didn't expected! 

  Even though, I had tried to tell Emmitt, quietly, “don’t worry Emmitt, to shout to Matt!  While he was indicating, by looking over to me!  Suddenly, noticed Matt had acknowledged me with a smile through the window of our work!  But which, I thought, was to late to do so!  Because as I really finally saw him looking at me!   And it was for some reason, I went straight into the back feeling that why, did you have to hurt and upset me so Matt?  Just tell me that why?  And to be quite honest, who I was nearly in tears over it!  Which I wouldn’t be surprised to think of finding out Emmitt would tell them, when he sees them again!

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