Wednesday 5 January 2000

Playing Games - Chapter 22


 Chapter 22


                                                               THE TIME

                               ROXIE SHOWED SANDY THEIR NEW ITEMS!


                                                 HUGE, GIANT RUBBER WILLIES!

                                   BOUNCY! BOUNCY! BOUNCY! BOUNCY!



 Now, what I’m going to tell you next was, did actually happen!  Truly it did!  But bloody hell!  Thank god, it happened while that so-call, brown eyes, who I had nickname Matt at the time, because of  his eyes to me, was so mesmerising, that just by looking deeper and deeper had managed to make me weak!  But who on this day, had a day off!  Because on this day, just before going into work had decided to pop into Wacky’s to say, "hello" to my friends!  For you could say, Wacky's was a the kind of shop, that sold all different funny things!  Including, fancy dress-costumes and all silly things!  Which had included, at this time, these new items that they just received!  But who had to place in the far, far back of their shop, because of what they were!  

 Because what happened on this practical day, while I went over there, to talk to Roxie, was she asked, “if I wanted to see sumat?  As they just received a new item!  That they just recently had in!  Which, after I replied, “ok!  Roxie took me over to the far back of their shop, to show me what they had!  Only, what this girl saw was, bloody hilarious!  Which I think Roxie had probably knew I would have find it hilarious also!  Because, what Roxie had wanted to show me in the far back was blooming loads and loads of huge, giant rubber willies!  Yes!  You got it!  Roxie had wanted me to see their enormous, huge black as well as white willies, in what was in a see-through, plastic bags!  

 Only, for seeing this!  What only came to mind, well you wouldn't want to know!  Because of happened next!  Roxie had decided to take one of them. from one of the packages to show me it properly!  And boy! properly she did! As, Roxie had decided to put them on!  Which, I can tell you right now, made this girl laugh so much!  That I honesty thought, 'was I gonna wet myself!  While all this was going on, Lynette, who was the Manager, couldn’t help by joining in with us!  While one of the others was serving a costumer!  But no soon had Lynette joined in, after watching Roxie putting this rubber willies on, she also, had went over to the far back to fetch a packet of these huge giant rubber willies!  

 Though, after Lynette had chosen this one, well you could say it was more funnier, then what Roxie had tried to show me hers!  And Why!  You may asked!  Well would  believe, Lynette had not only chosen a huge black wellie!  Well would you!  Because she had!  as, she said, “hey guys!  “What would you think, if I went straight over to your work Sandy, to show Deek this!  "Hey!  "Well, what would you think?  Which, after she startled me, by saying this!  Because of not knowing of whether she was having us on or not!  Well really had  thought, 'was she having a laugh!  As, like a joke-wise!  Ha-ha!  With this, enormous, huge, giant rubber Willie that was now hanging so down, from her, like Roxie's, had, said, “oh!  “So, you guys, think I’m only kidding then! 

 Which, after looking at one another, in total surprise!  Lynette then got hold of a very long Red Santa’s out-fit and waltz straight over to my work to show Deek what exactly she was really wearing!  And I’m not talking of that Santa’s costume!  But what was truly hiding underneath that bloody costume!  Which, as we already saw but who still couldn't stop laughing!  Because of what I can remember, was how Roxie, was watching me from their entrance, but who at the same time, who had dare to see if what was going to happen at my work, would happen!  So, what did I do, shall I say!  But strolled along into my work, quietly to see what Lynette was going to do what she was intended to do!  But while doing so!  Well brother!  Did I had to control my laughter first!  Because let's just say!  Normally, if something was extremely funny, well this girl, aka myself  would always, have tears rolling down from her cheek with laughter!

 So, no sooner had Lynette wondered into my work and who I had thought, 'calm down Sandy,' because as I still had more time to spare before starting work, did think to myself, 'I’ve just got to see this!  'Really, I have!  'I've just got to see it!  So, as I walked in quietly trying firstly not to get noticed by Deek!  Because of not wanting him to see me while Lynette would actually do this!  And do it!  Which, she had!  But at the same time I just really couldn't control myself from laughing!  Course, I was so sure, I really was!  Because of just imagining that if anyone!  And I do mean, anyone!  Would see someone like Lynette,  like I had!  Well what would you also, think that might go through your minds!  Well, who knows!  As, they may probably find what I saw, but what was going through, my mind, also, hilarious!  

 Anyway, as Lynette entered my work, she first cried out, Deek’s name over and over again!  Which while going around the stands to see if he was there!  Lynette had suddenly noticed a head popping out from the middle of one large table!  Course, as he was sorting some jeans out, that was underneath some big table!  But who was in total shock by the way he had looked, after noticing his face with a grin!  Because of how Lynette was dressed in that stupid, stupid long Red Santa’s out-fit!  But, who also, couldn't help of asking her, “what’s with the Santa’s costume?  “As, it’s not as if it’s Christmas yet! 

 Because before she had showed Deek the real reason, of why she did come into slowly revealed what was really hiding inside that costume of hers!  Well let's just say, you really should have been there to see Deek's face drop!  Not because Deek had seemed to be in total shock!  But that, he was not far far away, from looking at that huge, enormous rubber black Willie, that was seriously was hanging down and wobbled!  Like you wouldn't believe!  that Course, it was dangling way down and going side to side!        

  Though, just before, thinking did Deek could have notice me!  Course, of that enormous, gigantic rubber Willie!  A Willies that was honestly dangling so downwards! That it couldn't help wobbling side to bloody side in front of him!  Which was when, at this precise moment he seemed to have spotted me through this stand!  A stand in which I was really trying to hide myself through!  But know it couldn't have worked!  Course, if anyone would have been around then!  Well boy!  What would you have seen, was!  This girl, in tears with laughter!  But who!  If anyone could have seen me, would have probably thought to themselves, 'well, what is wrong with her?  Course, the only way that I can describe myself of when I always, used to laugh, like I had!  Was how "Sal Vulucano" had!  When I had always, seemed to make me laugh, while watching the guys, from The Impractical Jokers!  

 Which in my book, is not just fucking hilarious!  But who, while this girl sees him, does seriously cracks up like how he does!  Thinking 'oh!  'Please don't make me wet myself Sal!  Because, of the way, he alone, just simply makes me laugh so much!  And he does!  Course, of always, seeing him ending up crying, from every single time the others, do absolutely stupid things, that they were told to do!  Not forgetting, seeing Sal falling over, by taking one of the guys, down with him!  So, once again, that's why, I like to describe myself, as that hilarious!  As, he really kills me, with his laughter!   

 Anyway, getting back to when Deek had spotted me through that clothes stand, while also, seeing what was going to happen, at that moment!  Because, really!  For not trying to show that at any minute, I was ready to crack!  As I knew that, was what was going to happen to "little old me," Sandra D aka Sandy!  I tried not to look at Deek!  But who couldn't help myself, while trying not to laugh at the same time!  For what Lynette was all set of going to do right in front of his eyes!  Which before she had, had did make perfectly sure that there were no one around!  And I do mean, no one around!  So, while watching Deek look on his face, still smiling in a very strangest way!  Well just imagine, of what was going through his mind also!  Maybe, he could have started to be a little curious, as to what was going to happen!  Who knows!  But I'm dam well sure he was thinking of sumat!  

 Course, all Lynette was really doing back then, was just standing there like a complete idiot!  But there again!  That wasn’t anything new about that!  Because all my friends that worked with Lynette had also, liked to act so silly in the same way!  So, really what Lynette was about to do was probably normal to her!  But not normal, for the likes of us even had a sense of humour!  Well while I was still looking around to see if anyone of our customers was there or not, course, of what Lynette was about to do in front of poor Deek!  Well Deek had still looked as if he was trying to understand of why, I was hiding myself amongst that clothes stand!  Which, come on!  Knowing me, as he did, should have an idea!  But nope!  He hadn't!  

 Course, of watching Lynette, who was now, all set to revive or unfold something that was under her Santa’s costume!  Because after Lynette had said to Deek, “well, Deek!  "If you must know, there is a very good reason, of why I’ve come like I have!  Which, she added, “was I wanted to show you something!  Which by the look on Deek’s face had probably thought, 'well, what can you possibly want to show me!  But who then, added, to her, "besides of showing me, this silly costume, you’re wearing!  Which was before, anyone could say, Jack Robinson!  Lynette had slowly, slowly grabbed hold to both ends of this costume to opened it, to reveal what she was really intended to show Deek!  Only, as Lynette was slowly about to open this long costume of hers, well what I first noticed was  noticing how Deek was reacting to it!  And secondly!  At the same time, how I then discovered, only right there and then, that walking towards us and so very closely may I add, was this tall young woman!  Who was pushing her baby girl in a push-chair! 

 Which what was more funnier!  Was, how this young lady was black!  Which, you might think 'well, so what, if this young lady was black?  Well first of all!  Can any of you try to imagine what might have gone through this lady’s mind?  Well could you!  If she had really crapped eyes on what was in front of her, like Deek and myself had!  While walking more and more closer to us!  Well, could you!   Course, of remembering that huge, humongous, giant rubber Willie that Lynette had chosen to take out of her package, before strolling into our work-place!    

 Not to mention, what was going through my mind, while I was laughing!  Because by now, Lynette had more then less, revealed what was hidden inside that costume of hers!  Which, I couldn’t stick around any longer!  Course, it was really how Lynette had chosen to show Deek that black Willie!  So, that's why, if you can image you were in my boat, of seeing Lynette hadn't closed that custom!  While that young woman with her baby was really getting more and more closer to us!   Course, come on now!  If that was anyone else! Well they also, probably couldn’t miss of seeing this enormous rubber Willie that was seriously, dangling down from her either!   

 So, as soon as Lynette revealed what she had intended to do in front of Deek but who shortly after, suddenly discovered that lady was pushing her child in a push-chair!  Well, that was when I couldn’t seem to control myself from really laughing!  As, I had to eventually, run out from my work!  Because once again, just imagine what Deek must have felt!  Of seeing that poor customer, with her child, of coming towards us!  But, who was more now, far, far closer to Lynette, for seeing that huge, humongous, rubber Willie dangling down from her and it was black!

 Now, at this point!  I had ran out of my work, as fast as I could say, "Jack Robinson!  Because after seeing of what I saw!  Well let’s just say, if anyone could have seen me laughing as I did, well they would have probably mistaken me as someone crying!  Then, laughing her socks off!  Course, after I ran straight back to Roxie, still laughing, I then, suddenly started to hear the laughter going on in my work!  But which had really sounded like screeching, then normal laughing, between friends would!  But again, as for myself!  Well, while I was really laughing from what I’ve saw, well I couldn’t help myself, from shouting across over Deek from where I was, “do you mind if I could come in, in a minute!  “As, I think I need to just try and calm myself down, before coming into work!

 Though, two days later!  And I do mean, two days later!  After walking into work, thinking to myself, 'I was going to start!  But who didn’t!  Because of what I found out, that on that day, I had a day off!  Only it wasn't just after seeing Deek of trying to tell me that I wasn’t working on that day!  But it was that, I couldn’t help of over hearing a little silly laugher coming directly inside Deek’s office!  While, at the same time, Deek was standing right close to where, this laugher was coming!  But which, was looking back and forth at me!  Smiling away, while still standing in-between the door-way from the back to his office door!  So, once again, if it wasn't for the door to Deeks office of being wide open, well I wouldn’t have heard that silly little laugher coming from it!  Which, I had thought, was that Matt?  Course, of knowing Matts laughter!  But if so!  

 Well, I wondered, what was the guy laughing at?  As, to who knows!  Because what had came to my mind was, if that was my darling Matt!  Watching the monitor, from what was going on, on that day!  When Lynette had came wondering in, as she did!  Like Sylvester "bloody" Stallone character, from that film, Rocky!  Or like Santa Claus!  Because of that custom!  Well, who knows!  Deek could have mentioned it to Matt!  Of when he had came in the following day, so he could have wanted to rewind that sodding tape, from the monitor stored, in Deek’s office!  So, he to could see it for himself!  But, if you must know!  Did Deek had really made out that on that day was my day off or not, wouldn't be surprised, that he had!  Course, of trying to get me away, from my darling Matt!  Who wasn't just laughing as he was, on that day!  But who frankly!  I was sure it was!  But, who had looked-like he definitely seemed to be hiding in Deeks office, with no lights on! 


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