Wednesday, 5 January 2000

Playing Games - Chapter 24


  Chapter 24


                                                                 THE TIME


                                        SANDY SO WANTED TO TELL MATT,


 But, sometime later while I was busy working away in the shop and who Matt had a day off I heard someone was having a leaving Party, which when I asked, “who’s leaving?"  But who Bobby had replied, “Matt is.”  Could say, I really had felt my whole world was now about to fall apart.  Which may sound, silly to some, but it was also true, as that was what I truly felt!  But could I hide these feelings of mine, that I had any longer?  Well I could not?   As all I could answer to that was, “No!  "Not Matt!  So, while trying to continue to work with Bobby or that certain Manager that I don’t really want to remember because of what they did to me shortly after Matt had announced he was leaving, nearby, must have noticed that I was truly upset about it, as they both saw a tear running down from my cheek.

 But whoever that saw me then, first asked me, “what’s wrong Sandy?"  But as I didn’t want to tell them, gave them some poor excuse that as you must know, being a really sensitive person who’s never had those sort of feelings for anyone in their lives, didn’t want to show that I was so upset of the news.  Even though, something had told me, I’m sure they knew already of what was wrong by the way that half of the times, while trying to do my work I went into a silent mood with my head slightly down. 

 Shortly after though, while putting something in the bin, noticed Matt was just about to come in all smiles and who was with someone.  As for myself well, because of the way I was truly feeling, at that moment, didn’t want to stick around, so I walked as far away from the front or was it really from Matt?  Which I’m sure that when Matt came wondering in to talk to only Bobby, could also notice something was going on, as he asked Bobby, “what’s wrong with Sandy?"  While looking at me at the same time, as I did just slightly notice them talking, but who also tried not to look at him directly, in case I would start to show my emotions by crying.

 So, after noticing Bobby was slightly glancing over to me, as well as hearing her say to Matt, while I was trying so hard to carry on with my work, but who at the same time couldn’t stop of  hearing them both course, of my emotions was definitely starting to show.   As it came so close to me crying since knowing that the guy who I’ve got to admit truly love was now finally going to be leaving, “Sandy is upset!  And even though I couldn’t look at them, couldn't help of wanting too.  Because of how I imagined how was he reacting to the fact, I was so upset, over the news he was leaving?  Or what his face was like now, after Bobby (Wednesday), had told him, was the  same meaning?  Hey!  As I think I would have loved to have known that! 

 Now, while I was still making myself busy but who was now going around then really staying in one spot as I was when I first heard Matt asking Bobby, “what's wrong?"  Could still hear them both talking away, only as I heard them now talking about "who’s going to this leaving Party?"  Still, couldn’t help feeling, but were they?  And why were they looking at me?  Especially, Matt himself, as he now knew of how I was truly feeling then has for what happened next was while going through the clothes, but only pretending, that I was sorting out, in size order, heard Matt shouted down to me, “hey!  “Sandy, are you coming to my leaving Party?" 

 Which, surely he must have known deep down that what my answer would be!  Because if he didn’t, shall I say, well the guy would be stupid not to see!  Even stupid, because if he knew already of how I was feeling for him of leaving, well to just go to his leaving Party would make things twice as worst for me.  So, trying not to cry, I shouted to Matt still not looking, mind you, “I can’t!  “As I think I’m busy then.”  Which I’m sure he must have known that wasn't an true.


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